One Unsympathetic Night

 

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There was a time, long long ago,
when grief consumed and controlled me.
Desperate thoughts and delusions
carpeted the walls of my mind.
And if memory serves me correctly,
it all began one unsympathetic night.

I was lost in empty thought.
Resting quietly,
against the old familiar comforts,
which only a saggy, depleted featherbed can give.

But powdered blue notions,
ran rampant that eve,
spinning a trap, right in front of my eyes.
And nothing could have prepared me
for the ambush; I was about to face.

Typically, I have always been on the offensive,
but that night, I was taken by complete surprise.
It seemed as if a tornado,
one filled with erratic and overemotional thoughts,
had somehow landed on top of me.

I felt my chest tighten,
surrounded by every last unfortunate thought I’d ever had.
Even the cuckoo down the hall
seemed to chime a little less enthusiastically
as I wrestled with my mind.

Every hope, wish, dream,
seemed to vanish into thin air.
I was left nauseated by midnight blue reflections,
and I laid there motionless,
desperately waiting for dawn to arrive.

At first light, I knew something was still terribly off.
I became temporarily crippled,
the fear of ignorance—all-consuming.
The overwhelming feelings,
ones comprised of dolor and distress,
clung to the recesses of my troubled heart.
I was quite literally suffocating,
in-between swells of uncertainty.

It wasn’t long before mama came looking for me.
I must’ve had the look of death itself,
as the light in her eyes
grew instantaneously dim.

Mama worked to make sense of my sickly state,
and I tried to give her all that remained of my spirit.
But my half-smile looked more like a frown,
and there was just no way of deflecting
all the worry situated in her gaze.

I knew right then and there;
mama had recognized my face as her very own.
It seemed the dispiritedness in our humble abode
had finally caused the undulating waters to reach me.

As I now reminisce,
recalling the details of that one unsympathetic night,
I realize just how long it’s taken for the floodwaters to recede.
And even though the waves have since quieted,
I am still not the same girl I once was.

© 2020 Michelle Cook


Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/sleep-bed-sheets-covers-comforter-839358/

 

Lost under the bluest of skies

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I remain lost
Under the bluest of skies
Nobody, not one
Sees the hurt in my eyes

I am not free
To be who I choose
No matter what I do
I always seem to lose

I once thought
That love was real
But the longer I live
The less that I feel

And the truth is
I’ve never belonged
This is how It’s been
My whole life long

© 2019 Michelle Cook


Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/sky-cloud-plant-dandelion-blue-2969489/

 

When we ignore…

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They scatter, fall
Lose their way
Their lives uncertain
Full of disarray

They’ve taken risks
Leading them astray
Every decision a regret
They’ll now have to pay

They can’t go on
To start a new day
Unkind words leave them
In misery and dismay

Their agony is contagious
So we keep them at bay
Then they vanish forever
As their souls fade away

We cry out in anguish
Looking for a ray
But they’re gone for good now
There is nothing left to say

© 2019 Michelle Cook

*I wrote this yesterday as I thought about all the people around us who suffer alone every day.  We may not understand exactly what our friends are going through, or how to help them, but a simple word of kindness is all it often takes to make a difference in somebody’s life.  So I urge you to reach out to someone today.  You could be the one to save their life without even knowing it.  I’ve had friends do this for me; they never even knew how much their words meant to me, but they were everything in those moments when I was lost and felt like giving up.  Please don’t ignore your friends; they need you… ~M xo

All because of you

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If love can conquer all
Than I am a victor in your arms
And not even the plagues of the world
Can touch the light in my soul

For you have enabled me to shine
During the darkest most dismal days
Illuminating my way
Even when I could not

There were a myriad of times
When I walked through shadowed realms
And you were there
To help guide my way

You never left me alone on that arduous path
Embracing me daily
Your outstretched arms ever ready
Never faltering to motion me in

And every bend in the road
Was a heartwarming gift
Because you were there
Loving me as only you can

And now I am beholden to you
My love, my life
The one who nurtures
Every part of my being

What was once before me
Has dissipated at my feet
And it’s all because
You remained by my side

© 2019 Michelle Cook

Missing you…

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I just spent two long hours
Pouring out how I feel
Then deleted all the words
That I wanted to conceal

I was rambling on
And nothing made sense
I feel like everything I say
Is in self-defense

I guess I’m just feeling lost
Because everyone is gone
And most don’t understand
How I’ve felt all along

And so the tears have won again
Like they sometimes do
I guess this is just what happens
When I find myself missing you

© 2019 Michelle Cook

Dismal days

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Dismal days
Are all the craze
Everyone’s living
In a haze
Could this be
Just a phase
Or are we stuck
In a repeating maze
Look at the way
People gaze
So many lost
In a doleful daze
Will we ever find
Those hopeful rays
Or stay prisoners of
Depressive waves
Can we all give
Encouraging praise
Or will morosity
Be what stays
Everyone has a choice
To change their ways
Kindness has always
Been what pays
Can you share
Your love full blaze
There really isn’t time
For delays

© 2019 Michelle Cook

Silver Sand

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Silver grains of sand
Tickle my fingers
Running straight through
Never willing to linger

And just like time
They empty from my hand
Causing me to wonder
Where every speck will land

Will they become more
Transformed into something of worth
Or will they forever be fragments
Of unembellished earth

© 2019 Michelle Cook


For a month of writing prompts, click here;  Silver sand

Like petals wilting in the rain

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Do you ever just feel
That sorrowful ache in your heart
When someone you love
Starts falling apart

It kills you inside
Knowing they’re in pain
It’s this crushing somber feeling
Like petals wilting in the rain

And your heart starts to break
Pieces falling to the floor
There’s nothing you can do
You just can’t save them anymore

For they’ve given up their will
No fight left within
So you wait in the shadows
Silently hoping that they’ll win

But you know the feeling well
Having felt the same way too
All of life’s dismal thoughts
Pressing relentlessly into you

And with that bleak remembrance
Of days that killed you too
You just have to pray
There’s nothing more you can do

© 2019 Michelle Cook

The blahs

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I often find
I’ve no words to say
Especially at
The end of the day

But inspiration can
Bring all kinds
Softly nudging ideas
Right into my mind

And I think about some
Who haven’t written
Two months, three days
Since the writing bug’s bitten

And let me tell you
It affects me too
All those words
They used to spew

Now they’ve just left me
Without hardly any hope
It’s the reason I often
Just wanna mope

You see…that’s what
Sadness does
Makes you miss
All that was

And yeah I know
I’m not making much sense
Thankfully dispiritedness
Isn’t an offense

© 2018 Michelle Cook


Originally written; October 2018

In between the clover and the dampened earth…

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I noticed him lying there, in between the clover and the dampened earth. He was only a mere mirror image of who he once was. I wanted to save him, and restore him to his original state. But it seemed that the truth had sucked the life right out of his chest. Over time, it had appeared that the map, the course set for his life, really had changed; or had he read it wrong to begin with?

Memories of her began to fill his heart and head once more. She had been the loveliest woman he had ever known. Her skin was always soft and warm, like a silk blanket covered with the faintest hint of her perfume. But deep down in the dungeon of his worn out soul, he knew what he had done. He could still picture the two halves of her dress, left frayed and worn. He had been consumed by fear that night so very long ago, and he remembered standing as still as the dark night above him while he watched as the moon exploded. She had hurriedly dressed, then wept as the music faded away. An uncertain destiny awaited, for now, they had no other choice.

Holding her gaze briefly from across the room, he knew she was no longer his. As she rushed out into an unknown future, she became transfixed by all the wondrous lights, and never even noticed that he was still there. A steady breeze of newfound potential guided her along, while he kept his hands in his pockets, nervously playing with his keys. And suddenly his future hopes and dreams began to fade as the old trusty door to his future began to melt against the corroding brass frame. He wondered if it was all a glitch or just his imagination. Droplets of sweat began to fall from his brow as he remembered back to how the blade had glistened, and venom seemed to pour from his eyes, as poisoned tears filled his invisible cup. He drank the last drop, then plummeted into a sea of depression. Decompression arrived quickly after the window to his hopes blew out.

She began to see nothing except heavenly creatures, all of whom featured boldly in her dreams. She had changed and now reeked of sugary sweets, her teeth giving away her disguise. Fishnet stockings were a pleasant surprise to all the new men in her life, and an eruption of presents could be seen as each one bribed her for the countless pleasures they knew she’d provide. In the end, only a half-eaten muffin and a spoon remained; mere remnants of another morning that meant nothing. She snickered as she ran away from all of them until she noticed what was behind her. She couldn’t escape the truth; it had finally captured her soul.

The last bell chimed, and not even the crickets could be heard, as she watched the floating orb hover over the painting above the hearth. And suddenly both he and her remembered the planter boxes of peculiar looking pansies, the ones that once lined the odd shaped path which had led them to each other. And then they both finally noticed the secret, entombed inside the jar of honey. It clearly held the key to all their torment, something they had never once allowed themselves to see.

© 2018 Michelle Cook


I had quite a bit of  fun writing this short story, which is a combination of all of the December writing prompts.  Hope you enjoyed it!  ~M 😉

To read the prompts, click here.

Poor Peter

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He came to her
With eyes sparkling bright
It was half past two
In the middle of the night

He was grinning wide
From ear to ear
And had a message for her
That was crystal clear

She winked at him
Then went back to sleep
He was left dazed and confused
Yet made not a peep

His mischievous smile faded
As he gave up the go
Accepting the sad truth
That there would be no show

© 2018 Michelle Cook


This is Peter’s side of the story, you can find Petunia’s here.