I keep track of all the days…

I keep track of all the days in between;
the ones when you don’t say you love me.
And during those days,
my heart beats a little less enthusiastically,
the sighs are a little longer,
and my shoulders slump a little more.
Sometimes the longing and the aching
can be almost unbearable.
But then I think back to all the times
when those three little words
were never spoken at all;
all those years filled
with such a lonely longing in my chest.
I know I will never be in that place again
because you always remind me of that
with your steadfast presence every day.
And when that realization hits me,
that you’re not leaving me,
I’m finally able to stop myself from falling,
cradling my mind, and finding comfort
in my own embrace.
It’s in that nurtured state
that I somehow find a way to let go
of the demons which harbor my weary discontent.
And eventually, that nagging feeling
starts to evaporate, disintegrating bit by bit
in every relaxing exhale,
calming a little more in every deep breath.
I’m never quite the same, though,
as my own strength can never carry me
all the way through.
And so I wait patiently until you’re here again,
reminding me that love is more than words.
But because you know I need to hear it,
you expose your stubborn soul to me,
finally giving in to my neediness.
And that’s when my heart explodes
in reassured joy
because your loving words mean everything to me.
And even though I already know you love me,
the reminder frees my soul and refuels my spirit.

© 2021 Michelle Cook


Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/natural-woman-in-park-female-4646384/

Loneliness

Loneliness
it comes in many forms
and I have known them all.
But I think the loneliest times
are when I’m surrounded
by a sea of expressionless faces.
Those empty-eyed, silent beings
always appear to be lost in
mind-numbing, alien-sweeping,
brain-snatching activity.
And if I stare intently enough,
focusing long and hard enough,
I can almost see those denatured
souls being surreptitiously sucked
out of every finger-tapping mortal
who has unknowingly fallen victim
to the technological advances
of our times.
It often leaves me queasy
and fearfully uneasy.
For I must admit that I too,
have fallen subject to the
interest of self-isolation
within the matrix.
Using it as a security blanket
for companionship
because community
no longer exists
within the confines
of my existence.
There are instances
when I do attempt
to turn the world around.
And with desperate breath
I try to disengage
from the illuminated rectangle
nestled nice and neat
between my pale palms.
But then loneliness sneaks in,
finding me once again.
And the screen in my hands
becomes the only life left
to be found.

© 2021 Michelle Cook


Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/portrait-woman-black-and-white-2308893/

There was nothing left to say

Capture

There was nothing left to say,
at the end of that fateful day.

The next morning,
the sky parted as usual
as the birds all sang in unison.
Each one responding
without a trifle
of a pink puffy, cloudy care.

The day lazily drifted by
as the trees did their perennial thing,
each one dancing and swaying
to the sound of the honeybees,
all very eager and harmonious,
in their afternoon endeavors.

Even the flowers
dressed in white,
parading around in their newest,
frilly attire,
couldn’t have been,
more carefree.
Each one so unassuming,
in their leisure,
yet studious displays.

Because like always,
it was just another ordinary day.
Another glorious day
to be alive.
At least that was the case
for everyone, but her.

© 2019 Michelle Cook


Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/tree-dawn-bird-winter-weather-3189333/

The lonely one

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Thinking of you today
and I ask myself this…
How can anyone be lonely
when they have a million friends?
But I suppose it’s more than that
isn’t it?
It’s the foundation
the connectedness
the secret loyalties among confidences.
All these things matter
in order to gauge the true value of a friend.
And sadly
without the right combination
our state of loneliness
is never very far away.

© 2020 Michelle Cook


Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/beach-sand-sea-water-wave-254480/

 

My Sarah bunny…

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You’re the only one
who truly ever knew me.
I confided in you
nearly every day.
I whispered to you
all my secrets in the dark,
and promised you
everything my little heart could give.
You were the only one who listened
every day when the fights erupted.
You heard my screams
and comforted me the best you could.
When I cried my eyes out,
spilling out countless tears,
you showed me
that I was not alone.
You never left my side,
which always made me feel loved.
And you’re still special to me,
even though you’re not a living being.
I think you’re the only reason
I had any hope at all back then
because my little girl eyes
couldn’t find love or comfort anyplace else.

© 2020 Michelle Cook

Lost under the bluest of skies

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I remain lost
Under the bluest of skies
Nobody, not one
Sees the hurt in my eyes

I am not free
To be who I choose
No matter what I do
I always seem to lose

I once thought
That love was real
But the longer I live
The less that I feel

And the truth is
I’ve never belonged
This is how It’s been
My whole life long

© 2019 Michelle Cook


Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/sky-cloud-plant-dandelion-blue-2969489/

 

Now the winter shivers

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Now the winter shivers
In this barren land.
Near and far the echoes
Without a welcome hand.

Now the winter clamors
As naysayers pave the way.
The vile commence each battle
What more is there to say.

Dimmer than the most atrocious
On the crowning of darkest night.
Sure-footed soldiers march into battle
Prepared for one more fight.

The world lies in anguish
No longer praying for relief.
Smack dab in the pit of sorrow
Buried in inescapable grief.

© 2019 Michelle Cook


The rhyme and meter of this poem, were inspired by the poetic works of Edna St. Vincent Millay, who wrote “Autumn Chant,” which can be found here.

Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/kz-kz-dachau-konzentrationslager-2063339/

 

Destiny

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Tragic are the days
Without a hand to hold
When love is miles away
And nights are forever cold

And as those days turn into years
Futility becomes our only lover
The heart begins to lose
Any chance to rediscover

We spend our remaining years
Sad and all alone
Without another person
To call our very own

And we regret the time
We wasted in between
It’s too bad our destiny
Remained unforeseen

© 2019 Michelle Cook

The Edge of Forever

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There she sat
At the edge of forever
Lost in the gloom
Of the shadowy weather

Slumped all alone
In her dismal state
She wondered if anyone
Could possibly relate

Was her solitary life
Always meant to be
If only the answer
She could one day see

Forever seemed too far
As the friendless void imprisoned
No condemnation to pass
This was mostly her decision

© 2019 Michelle Cook


For a month of writing prompts, click here;  The edge of forever

Monday musings

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It’s easy to feel lost
In a world so grand
With thousands of people
Who cannot understand

We’re just one small speck
In a universe so vast
The memory of our lives
Will someday be left in the past

So be all that you can
In this brief life you’ve been given
And don’t ever forget
To spend each day truly livin

Always remember this
It’s never too late to start anew
And try to give everyone in your life
The very best of you

© 2018 Michelle Cook

Liquid love

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I miss the feel
Of liquid love
It’s the only thing
I can still think of

I miss the days
Of never being alone
The feel of a warm touch
Melding with my own

I miss the passion
Found in a kiss
And still wish there was a way
To bottle bliss

I miss the life
That I once knew
When I didn’t have to live
Without a me and you

© 2018 Michelle Cook


For a full month of writing prompts, click here!  Bottled bliss