humor

Eager Advancements

~ ~M ~ 33 Comments

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She’s the kind that seeks attention
From men of all sorts
Just watch her for a few minutes
And see the way she cavorts

It’s really quite revolting
The way she digs her claws in
And all those poor unsuspecting men
Nobody knows what’s happened to them

It’s funny because I notice her
Day after day after day…
She seems annoying as hell
And just won’t go away

She’s the kind of woman
Who only speaks with the guys
I shiver at the thought
Of what’s underneath her disguise

Maybe she’s actually quite decent
I could have it all completely wrong
Maybe she’s a real sweet lady
And I’ve been oblivious all along

I suppose I’ve come to the conclusion
That I’ll never really know anything for certain
But I do know one thing
She’s obnoxious when she’s flirtin

And last but not least
Her eager advancements leave me quite ill
Too bad I’m not a guy
I might actually enjoy the thrill

© 2018 Michelle Cook

For a month of writing prompts, click here;  Eager advancements

The cobweb cloaked coven

~ ~M ~ 24 Comments

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Pearl was a pistol
Janezza was a jerk
Glenda was a grumpy ol’ git
Who drove everyone berserk

Nilda was the nice one
But Irma drove her insane
And because of Henrietta’s hexes
Neither one now has a brain

Daniella was a devil
And yet she was always liked the best
But mostly only by male devils
Who liked staring at her chest

Wanda was the youngest witch
She’d bring warlocks home each day
But because of her venereal diseases
She could never get any of them to stay

Tilly was the tallest
Until Shirley shot right past
Now they’re both so old they’re shrinking
And wondering how life went by so fast

Lastly there was Lily
The prettiest witch of all
Until one day her wand exploded
Causing bits of her to be strewn across the wall

The cobweb cloaked coven has since retired
Put up their brooms and stored away their wands
And if you ever want to find them
You’ll have to go looking beyond the beyond

But be careful if you go there
For those old biddies they aren’t so sweet
And if you visit them for Halloween
You may just get a trick instead of a treat

© 2018 Michelle Cook

For a month of writing prompts, click here; The cobweb cloaked coven

Sick

~ ~M ~ 18 Comments

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Buried beneath
Your featherbed cover
Feeling so bad
You hope that you’ll smother

Everything aches
You can’t lift your head
You pray for relief
But just wish you were dead

Slinking to the bath
Nothing matters anymore
As you lay there vomiting
On that cold tile floor

You could easily perish
And you’d be thrilled
For it would end what feels
Like your head being drilled

With your eyes bugging out
You pray for mercy
But none of your friends
Offer murder as a courtesy

And you curse their names
For not offering a way out
While your body heaves
And purges another bout

And you decide if you make it
You’ll never speak to them again
Good thing for everyone
Death takes you in the end

© 2018 Michelle Cook

Brimstone Brew

~ ~M ~ 12 Comments

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Round the cauldron
They all took turns
Blathering their opinions
Cackling their concerns

A quadrivial group
Gossiping away
Nothing but prattle
In which to say

Their brimstone elixir
Fizzled and bubbled
But after listening to their words
The concoction grew troubled

Then with a sudden eruption
And an unforeseen flash
Those four old biddies
Well they all turned to ash

And all anyone can relay
About that unspeakable day
Is that their beloved potion
Must have had some repressed emotion

A reminder to be careful what you say. 😉

© 2018 Michelle Cook

For a month of writing prompts, click here; Brimstone brew

The Mystery of Milmonyville

~ ~M ~ 33 Comments

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The town of Milmonyville
Was such a curious place
Lined with quaint shops
Filled with wares of fine taste

It was like stepping back in time
As you walked down the street
And men would tip their hats
To every woman that they’d greet

Most thought it rather odd
That the people were so welcoming
And many would never go back
Because they found it so unsettling

It was almost as if the town
Was too perfect in some regards
Everything was polished and sparkling
Something you couldn’t disregard

And that old town of Milmonyville
Is still a mystery even today
Especially after heaps of bodies
Were found floating in their pristine bay

© 2018 Michelle Cook

Writing prompt: The mystery of Milmonyville