sadness

Wilted

~ ~M ~ 19 Comments

Wilted, that’s how I feel,
a flower that’ll never bloom again.
My petals droop and die,
fluttering to the ground one by one;
will I ever be restored?

I’m going through this phase;
maybe someone can relate.
Emptiness encases me
like a thick woolen glove.

I’m trying to escape the feeling
of being smothered and surrounded
by all that has invaded my insides
over these past fifty-some years.

Is it too much to ask
to be able to understand myself?

© 2025 Michelle Cook

*These were some personal sentiments I found when reading through my journal over this past year. I think I’m much closer to understanding myself now, but there are days when the weight of this world still closes in on me and reminds me of all the things I wish I could change. I’m happy that I never stay stuck in my head for long, and I generally snap back after a few days of wallowing in self-pity. I’m continuing to look for ways to keep a positive outlook on life. Nobody wants to be droopy forever. 😉

Photo generated with AI

Cancer

~ ~M

It’s like a knife that peels
A blade that steals
It keeps embedding stakes in my heart

And you can’t die
Cause then I couldn’t lie
About the pain it’d impart

I need you to fight
Give it all your might
But I just feel you wither

The tears are there
Beneath the surface they stare
Fuck,
I just need you

© 2024 Michelle Cook

Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/girl-sitting-sadness-seal-legs-1707993/

For those of you who left comments, thank you. I’ve decided not to publish comments or to comment back and I hope y’all can understand. Much love… ~M xo

The lonely place

~ ~M ~ 33 Comments

There’s a lonely place
where you exist
I try to forget you
yet the memories persist

You were once my strength
you anchored my soul
but after everything you said
it all finally took its toll

I remember sinking to my knees
in painful defeat
my perfect image of you
at last shattered complete

I wanted to hold onto the good
but the good wouldn’t stay
and looking back
I’m relieved you went away

© 2024 Michelle Cook

Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/tree-field-moon-night-sky-meadow-736884/

To be something

~ ~M ~ 6 Comments

Like the wind
I come and go
And where I’ll end up
Not even I know

I try my best
To show who I am
But even those closest
Can’t understand

I often wonder
About things I should do
But lack of encouragement
Leaves me feeling blue

I feel like the whole world
Is expecting me to fall
But deep in my heart
I’m giving it my all

I’m no competitor
I’ve just never been
But I want to live my life
And be something in the end

© 2024 Michelle Cook

Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/dandelion-wild-flower-7854275/

Silent killer

~ ~M ~ 35 Comments

Silent killer,
invisible threat,
wrapped around my heart
like an all-consuming net.
Tugging, squeezing,
barely able to breathe,
this is the reason
why I endlessly grieve.
The elephant in the room
gets heavier on my heart,
feels like my insides
are being ripped apart.
Loss is a thing
I cannot seem to bear;
still, the weight of it
follows me everywhere.

© 2022 Michelle Cook

Photo credit: https://pixabay.com/photos/waterdrop-grief-trauerkarte-4447343/